College Football Humor

Some college football humor courtesy of our friend and avid reader, NB Tex.

Enjoy.

College football and higher education………..

Ohio State's Urban Meyer on one of his players:   "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his   grades and he doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words."  __________________________________________   Why do Tennessee fans wear orange?   So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday,   and pick up trash on Monday.   ___________________________________________   What does the average Alabama player get on his SATs?   Drool.   ___________________________________________   How many Michigan freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb?   None. That's a sophomore course.   ___________________________________________   How did the Georgia football player die from drinking milk?   The cow fell on him.   ___________________________________________   Two West Virginia football players were walking in the woods.   One of them said, "Look, a dead bird."   The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?"   ___________________________________________   A University of Cincinnati football player was almost killed yesterday in a   tragic horseback-riding accident.   He fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death.   Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the horse.   ___________________________________________   What do you say to a University of Miami Hurricane football player dressed in a three-piece suit?   "Will the defendant please rise."   ___________________________________________   If three Florida State football players are in the same car, who is driving?   The police officer.   ___________________________________________   How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a girlfriend?   There's tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck.   ___________________________________________   What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas cheerleaders in one room?   A full set of teeth.   ___________________________________________ University of Michigan Coach Brady Hoke is only going to dress half of his players for the game this week; the other half will have to dress themselves.   ___________________________________________   How is the Indiana football team like an opossum?   They play dead at home and get killed on the road.   ___________________________________________   Why did the Nebraska linebacker steal a police car?   He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche.   ___________________________________________   How do you get a former Illinois football player off your porch?   Pay him for the pizza.   ___________________________________________   What are the longest three years of a University of Kentucky football players life?   Freshman I, Freshman II, and Freshman III.