Flatulence Stats

Yep, we went there. 

According to Wikipedia flatulence is "the expulsion through the rectum of a mixture of gases that are byproducts of the digestion process of mammals and other animals." 

But wait, there's more:

• Chemical makeup of the average fart: 59% nitrogen, 21% hydrogen, 9% carbon dioxide, 7% methane, and 4% oxygen.
• The average person passes gas 14 times per day
• If you fart constantly for 6 years, 9 months and 23 days you would produce enough gas to explode an atomic bomb.
• A Cow farts enough each day to fill 30 party balloons.
• Farts exit the body at approximately 10 km/hour
• The odor of farts comes from small amounts of hydrogen sulfide gas and mercaptans in the mixture. 
• The more sulfur-rich your diet, the more sulfides and mercaptans will be produced by the bacteria in your guts, and the more your farts will stink. Foods such as cauliflower, eggs and meat are notorious for producing smelly farts, whereas beans produce large amounts of not particularly stinky farts.
• Contrary to a popular misconception, fart noise is not generated by the flapping of the butt cheeks. 
• Another major source of fart gas is bacterial action. Bacterial fermentation and digestion processes produce heat as a byproduct as well as various pungent gases. The resulting bubbles of gas tend to be small, hot, and concentrated with stinky bacterial metabolic products. These emerge as the notorious, warm, SBD (Silent-But-Deadly), often in amounts too small to produce a good sound, but excelling in stench.
• Exceptional conditions exist when the fart is released into a small enclosed area such as an elevator, a small room, or a car. These conditions limit the amount of dilution possible, and the fart may remain in a smellable concentration for a long period of time, until it condenses on the walls.
• A gentleman is mostly likely to fart first thing in the morning, while in the bathroom. This is known as "morning thunder," and if the gentleman gets good resonance, it can be heard throughout the household.
• Termite farts are believed to be a major contributor towards global warming.

• Fart travel time depends on atmospheric conditions such as humidity, temperature and wind speed and direction, the molecular weight of the fart particles, and the distance between the fart transmitter and the fart receiver. Farts also disperse (spread out) as they leave the source, and their potency diminishes with dilution. Generally, if the fart is not detected within a few seconds, it will be too dilute for perception and will be lost into the atmosphere forever. 
   
   
   (Sources: "Facts on Farts" by Breanna Lorenz along with many other web sites you will never want to visit...)